Thursday, April 23, 2009 @ 6:07 AM
You never get what you want, do you?
People wish they have everything - cars, money, attention, reputation, good friends. The list never ends. For me, I too have to succumb to this hunger. The need to have everything.
I want it. So much. But I just cant get it. No matter what I do, someone else is there before I do it. It's just that that person is just faster.
More. The need to have more never stops. It drives me crazy.
Scoring good marks for the test. I want it and I've never gotten it. Disappointing.
And then comes relationships. Some say enjoy your teenage life while you can - it never lasts long. I have to agree too, but to what degree do you have to enjoy it? Achieving the most notorious name in school? Having a boyfriend or girlfriend?
I don't mind people having these affections. But publicly displaying their everlasting love in public places irks me. Not that I'm jealous, I just don't realise why they are never ashamed.
As displayed in my previous posts, twitting. I too have gotten tired of using it. It was never cute. Never funny, just attention grabbing and mind-boggling.
Sometimes I just want everything in the world. Domination. This may cause the end of me - but if I die while succeeding, I shall die in peace. Doesn't look accomplishable now, but who knows, fate and destiny lies ahead of you.
I want to give up. I always end up regretting my choices. I never understand why. I should have studied well for my PSLE, I should have studied well for my tests, I should have made the initiative, but I just never picked up the courage to actually do it. I just didn't bother and left it to someone else to care about it. Why didn't I do this? Why didn't I do that? We always end up saying we should have. Without prior knowledge of the future, the path that we choose may not always be correct.
Why, why, why. The mighty word that prods a thousand words out of someone.
I have good friends, I have a reputation of being "good at my studies", but I'm afraid I'm about to lose the title. Stress and fatigue is catching up to me and I fear that I may fail in the process of resisting it.
As the Chinese saying goes - ren bi ren, qi si ren, which means to compare one with another, you'd always end up being angry. This phrase perfectly describes the desire of humans, more. Just more of what they have.
My brain needs to stop working. Now.
